Ski Wolf (2008) (RePost from the old Ryan’s Reviews site)

Description (from the box):
Ski Wolf mixes ‘Ski School’ and ‘Teen Wolf’ into a garbage plate of wacky, bloody, boob-filled tomfoolery that is sure to make you howl with retardation!  This is the exclusive pre-release screener copy!

Major Cast:
Casey Bowker as Scott Bateman / Ski Wolf, Trent Haaga as Ralston Zabku, Billy Garberina as Uncle Bill, Alix Lakehurst as Fantasia Snow, Saetia Lareoux as Katie McCormick, Jesse Ames as Marge Baglione, Josh Suire as Corn Dervish, Bob Heckman as Enore, Heather Maxon as Bunny, Dom Luongo as Tad

Written and Directed by Chris Seaver

I know a lot of die-hard long-time LBP fans are going to disagree with me, but I truly feel that Ski Wolf may just be the best LBP film ever, ever.  Yes, I know that Ski Wolf is much more reserved than the average LBP flick (no demons feeding on menses or anything like that), but while being more accessible to the average viewer, Ski Wolf is still very obviously LBP.  It’s still cheese, but instead of Velveeta, we’re talking aged Brie – better, more refined cheese.  And Chris Seaver is the King of Cheese.

Ski Wolf has a lot going for it.  On top of the funny-as-hell script, LBP anachronisms, and the hot and heavy pop-culture references, Ski Wolf also brings two b-movie regulars (Trent Haaga and Billy Garberina) together with the LBP family to great effect.  On top of the quality acting Haaga and Garberina bring to Ski Wolf, (and really, there is a sizeable difference between good quality camp and getting some people you know to read funny lines on camera) the LBP regulars get better and better with each successive film they are in.  You can tell the ease in delivery by LBP veteran Casey Bowker, and while there is just a wee bit of Teen Ape in Ski Wolf, Bowker’s performance was much more Scott Howard meets Spicoli.

In addition to the ever-higher evolving quality of acting, the production quality has gone up leaps and bounds.  Low Budget Pictures got a SKI RESORT???  The wolf effects were pretty damn near what was in Teen Wolf, and while there was still the gore effect or two, (and there is still some really shocking stuff – all I’m gonna say is baby eating???) overall Ski Wolf’s pint count was much more reserved than the average LBP film.

One of the things that has always drawn me to LBP – and coincidentally, also to the work of Quentin Tarantino – is that while you are watching, Chris tells you exactly where the story came from.  Seaver was very much inspired (not only in Ski Wolf, but many other films in the LBP catalogue) by the 80’s, and Ski Wolf may be one of the best cheesy 80’s movies ever made.  Even though it was made in 2008.  A perfect example: Billy Murray’s Carl Spackler (from Caddyshack) is reincarnated as Enore, reminding the viewer of the films (other than the really obvious ones) that inspired this film.

Trent Haaga plays Ralston Zabku, the preppy asshole cool kid from (insert name of your choice of many, many 80’s films here) who is going to taker over the ski resort from Uncle Billy (Garberina).  Bowker, as Scott Bateman, comes to party with his friends and Uncle Billy, but instead finds the peril the ski resort faces.  In classic 80’s movie fashion, Ralston surrounds himself with the requisite cronies (including porn actress Alix Lakehurst) that agree with every word from his mouth.

Also adding to the 80’s feel was Ski Wolf’s first appearance.  Seaver weaves together Ralston and cronies 80’s cool & crazy conversation and Casey Bowker as Michael Jackson in Thriller, but instead of a zombie, in this version he’s a werewolf.  For my money, this was the single best stand-alone scene I have ever seen from LBP, and I’ve seen quite a few LBP films. *

The only part of the film that I really thought could have been cut down shorter – and again, a bunch of LBP people are going to hate me for this, but – was the sex scene.  I thought the idea behind it was very funny, and the scene its self WAS funny, just not THAT funny!  I think if it were trimmed a bit, it wouldn’t slow down the film so much.  Then again, I guess if you have a porn star in your b-movie, you write a long sex scene.

Overall, I feel that Ski Wolf is the most easily accessible LBP film I’ve seen.  This is the film I can show my friends that I think MIGHT be interested in LBP, but I’m not at all sure.  With Ski Wolf, you get the spot-on cheese acting, the pop-culture references, the semi-parody humor, and even some tits and gore (but not LOTS of tits and gore!) without going into the extremes that much LBP aims for.  Like I said before, it’s still cheese, but it’s much better, more mature, aged cheese… the stuff that costs more then ten bucks a pound, no more Velveeta.

Overall 9 / 10

Ski Wolf is not on the imdb.

Ski Wolf will be for sale at:

Ski Wolf site:

*I’ve seen: Heather and Puggly Drop a Deuce, Heather and Puggly Crucify the Devil, Mulva, Mulva 2, Filthy McNasty, Filthy McNastier, Filthy McNastiest, Blood Trim, Ghoulish Chronicles From Bonejack High, Carnage for the Destroyer, Teenape Goes to Camp, Wet Heat, and Ski Wolf.  I think that’s it.**

**Since this original post, I have seen: House on Bonejack Hill, Destruction Kings, Teenape Goes to Camp, Wet Heat, Terror at Blood Fart Lake, and Taintlight.  Ski Wolf is STILL my favorite LBP flick to date.

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