descriptions (from the boxes):
Heather & Puggly Crucify the Devil: H and P are back in the sequel to “12 Inches of Dangling Fury” and “Drop a Deuce”. This time out, the sisters are part-time students, part-time exorcists as they battle the forces of evil in the city of Bonejack Heights. Little do they know, The Devil and his small band of minions are getting pissed at the rise in fallen demons, and Lucifer must set out on his own to kill Heather and Puggly and all of their friends that get in his way.
Rejoice in the fact that, for one more time, you get to see the hi-jinx of Johnny Douchebag, T-Bone, The Meistro & Proudfoot. Squeal in delight as you meet some new faces in the way of super-suave Sexcorsist Choach and his companion Sister Christian! Witness good and evil clash one last time… well… ok maybe not the last time, but one MORE time, and praise Christ for letting you live long enough to see the glory that is Heater and Puggly Crucify the Devil.
Blood, action, gore, sex, dance numbers. What more do you need!?
Blood Trim: Blood Trim is a short flick about the evil Desomond St. Croix and his bloodthirsty taste for the sweet tangy solitude of period blood. Yes, that’s right, this villain LOVES him some pussy plasma! When Geoffrey and his brood of sexy hos unwittingly unleash the spirit of Desomond, the part-tay heats up in a menagerie of death and Jamaican fury!
Spit seed as you witness scantily clad women run willy nilly around your hearts and tug at your nut strings! Dance the death dance as you find out what happens when five school chums, a talking vagina, and Michael Jackson have to stop a rampaging fiend hell bent on sipping the woman folk dry and ruling the world with a rasta filled fist!
Take heed, foolish mortals! Nothing can prepare you for such terror and cheese! Strap yourselves in for an explosive ride through your own dementia! This IS Blood Trim!
Ghoulish Chronicles from Bonejack High: Killer Kellerman Strikes Again: …tells the true-life adventures of Steffon, Mowgli, and Jill, three buds for life who are all about having the “good times” until one fateful night when their good times turn into nightmares due to playing with a oujia board. Two busty grim reapers tell the trio they have released the evil ghoul Killer Kellerman, who when alive was a child molester and psycho killer and all around nasty man …and now he is back to rape more supple young asses! The trio must find a way to send the evil Kellerman back to hell.
Check your noggins at the door folks as you are about to be thrust into a world of insane comedy, gore, sex charged romance, witches, big-boobed grim reapers, high school bullies, puppets, rap-off’s, 80’s music and be forced to ACCEPT this tomfoolery!
The first story of a trilogy, “Killer Kellerman Strikes Again” is sure to make you crap laughs for many years to come.
Major Cast: H&PCtD: Lauren Seavage as Puggly, Meredith Host as Heather, Matt Meister as The Meistro, AJ Stabone as Choach Blood Trim: Matt Meister as Geoffrey, Jesse Ames as Mitsu, Jen Stone as Junebug, Noel Williams as Fawn, Lauren Seavage as Wacko Jacko, Jason McCall as Desmond St. Croix Bonejack High: Shawn Green as Steffon, AJ Stabone as Mowgli, Meredith Host as Jill, Lauren Seavage as Gabriel & Crotch Phlegm, Jen Stone as Tangerine, Noel Williams as Azrael & Violet, and Jason McCall as Killer Kellerman.
Special Features: H&PCtD: None Blood Trim: Audio Commentary, Bloopers, New LBP Previews, Karaoke Kid: True Independent Story Short, Henrique Budnick Couto: Shorts and Previews, and
more! Bonejack High: 2 Audio Commentaries, Behind the Scenes Documentary, Bloopers, LBP 15th Anniversary Party Footage, LBP Commercials, Trailers, Easter Eggs, and more!
written and directed by Chris Seaver
DVDs by Low Budget Pictures
Either you love Low Budget Pictures (LBP), or you hate them. I have yet to find someone who thinks that LBP films are ok or so-so. They are either “fucking funny” or “what was that crap?” I
personally find LBP to be really funny. Obscene, offensive, and often very juvenile, but really funny. LBP is not for the weak of heart, stomach, or people too attached to good taste. An example: almost every LBP film Ive seen has had a dildo filling in for a penis somewhere! Also, the production quality on many LBP films is rather low, which is to be expected when working with the nearly non-existent budget most LBP films are shot for. What isnt to be expected on this level of filmmaking is the writing and the acting. Its way above par.
Yes, I will agree that there is a lot to hate in a Chris Seaver movie, especially if you are overly sensitive. LBP films are very offensive, but in an equal-opportunity kind of way. They try to offend the entire audience; they shock you to the point of laughter. These three films are no exceptions, they each have their own gross-out and controversial scenes. However, if you are highly offended or hurt by watching these films, you are taking LBP (and life in general, most likely) way too seriously. The point of LBP is to entertain, and I think these three films succeed.
H&PCtD is a continuation of the Heather and Puggly series, and while seeing the earlier films may help you get more of the jokes that are being tossed around fast and furious, it is not required to see the earlier films to enjoy this one. The Exorcist is one of my favorite horror films of all time, and to see it so lovingly parodied was great. Lauren Seavage has BECOME Puggly – her movements
and dialogue never waver and her portrayal of Puggly is perfect. Meredith Host has also grown into her character, and both give really good performances in this movie. Choach is a funny new character, who, like most LBP regulars, we will see again. The film has many subtle jokes (Sister Christian the nun, for example), but as most LBP flicks, this film excels in its physical comedy.
Blood Trim takes LBP and sidesteps some. There is no Meistro in this flick, no Teen Ape or Puggly. Blood Trim has all new characters to add to the LBP repertoire, including Desmond St. Croix – a Rasta, menses loving evil spirit, Michael Jackson (well portrayed by Lauren Seavage), and Vaggie – the talking vagina.
Yes, the story seems familiar LBP fare- some friends accidentally summon a demon that they have to defeat before it kills everyone – but the jokes in this are offensive even for LBP standards. I
mean: a period-blood loving evil spirit, embodying all of the stereotypes ever given to Rastafarians? Do I really need to say more? While offensive, the jokes are also very funny, especially M.J.s dialogue, and the physical comedy is also present, making Blood Trim one of the more laugh-filled half hours Ive spent recently.
Bonejack High goes back to the LBP mold, with Bonejack (obviously) and other LBP regulars appearing, but has an obvious lack of Teen Ape (which I was refreshed to see – when I first saw this film at TromaDance New Mexico 2005, all the LBP I was familiar with had Teen Ape in it, and dont get me wrong, I loves me some Teen Ape, but it was nice to see that Teen Ape was not at all required to make a funny LBP flick). Again, some teen-age friends are playing with powers they shouldnt be and release an evil killer that reeks havoc until they can put him back in the grave. However, this time the killer is a strange version of Sylvester Stallone wholl butt-rape you the first chance he gets.
What I liked about Bonejack High was the references to films of the eighties. I knew Seaver was a fan – the eighties are everywhere in his films, from the references to the ever-present picture of John Stamos – but its fun to hear the really bad rapping from Teen Witch brought back for a new generation to love or loathe, depending on your taste. While Bonejack High is familiar fare for the LBP crew, it is funny in its own way. The voices and ticks of the characters are particularly good (especially the always good Jason McCall as Kellerman), the dialogue as offensive (and hilarious) as ever, and its hard to beat the killing of a felt puppet. Who doesnt love puppet violence?!
Overall I felt that these three films, while being a lot of the same LBP fare, show a obvious progression. I would like to say maturity, but I KNOW thats the wrong word for it! Chris Seaver has shown through these three films a progression of his style. The first LBP I saw (the Filthy McNasty Trilogy and Mulva 1 & 2) had a feeling of home video. There was no argument that these films were beyond low budget, that they were no-budget films. What made those movies fun to watch was not the lighting, the camera work, or the effects; what made those movies fun was the writing. The writing was so good that you could take people with absolutely no acting experience, put them in front of a cheap digital camera with no lights (how very Dogme 95…) and these films were still funny. No, they were fucking funny. With these new films (and especially another that I unfortunately cant say any more about) the directing is moving up. The Seavage, after 25 plus films, is showing new chops with the camera. The effects, while still cheap enough to be laughed at just on the basis of that very cheapness, are getting better. The lighting, while still not the work of any DP ever, is getting out of that Dogme 95 aspect and is showing progression. And the composition of the shots that Seaver, or Jock De Queaf, chooses is becoming more interesting, more visually pleasing than in the past. It is obvious that Seaver knows how to direct his brand of actors, to get those character ticks and voices, the timing, and all of the other elements to fall into place, and create an accomplished performance from most of his non-actors.
If you like LBP, you will enjoy these films. If you hate LBP, these three flicks will just reinforce your opinion. If youve never seen any LBP, try Bonejack High as an introduction. You will be on one side of the fence or the other, no one sits in the middle here! I have many friends that will sit down and laugh to the point of tears watching LBP and probably just as many friends who think that LBP is the worst crap theyve ever seen. I usually have to prove them wrong by playing something I own that is worse – no matter what your guidelines on bad is – than the LBP flicks, but that never dissuades their opinion of LBP. Either you love it or you hate it, there is no in-between. I just happen to be a fan.
Heather & Puggly Crucify the Devil 7.5 / 10
Blood Trim 7 / 10
Ghoulish Chronicles from Bonejack High: Killer Kellerman Strikes Again 8 / 10